Many people choose a word for the year to guide and inspire them. I think it’s a cool idea and have sporadically done so. I’ve been looking at the past year and seeing what I accomplished and what I failed to accomplish, and the lessons learned. There are things I want to recommit to and things that I don’t. A word that really struck me as I went through this process was intention. I like it because it feels more malleable than goals. GOALS-an objective you set out to accomplish and do it or don’t do it. Mostly, don’t do it and then beat yourself up for what you didn’t do. INTENTION-an objective you are striving for but may be tweaked and changed as you go along. Perhaps as you progress, you feel differently about it or learn something that sends you in a slightly different direction. Then you can make adjustments accordingly. Now, I don’t exactly think goals are bad. I like to achieve things and check things off as done as much as the next person. I think where goals go awry are the stress and make wrong that are too often attached to them, or rather, the not reaching of them.
What if, instead of goals, we spent some time reflecting and dreaming of how we would like our life to look this upcoming year and pick a couple of things that excite and inspire us and set an intention for those things. It could be working on a relationship, paying off debt, taking a trip, writing a book, whatever that thing or couple of things are that would really make you feel good if you did them.
For example, one of my intentions is to incorporate a more vegetarian diet into our lifestyle. I have a Test Kitchen vegetarian cookbook that has some amazing recipes. I follow Eating Bird Food, which also has some delicious and not wholly vegetarian, but certainly healthy recipes. I look for resources that will help support my intentions, such as books, programs, etc. Initially, I’m just serving vegetarian meals a couple of times a week. I think they have been quite tasty and my husband and I have been enjoying them. But, my 94-year-old mother who lives with us, is not so open to the idea. If my meal looks foreign to her (not meat and potatoes or pasta), she turns up her nose and asks, ‘Is this one of your vegetable meals?’ Sometimes, she will try it and like it, other times she picks at it, will eat a little, declare she’s full and fill up on cookies. So, that’s one of my obstacles. Do I make multiple meals? Or, keep cooked chicken breasts and hamburgers frozen and at the ready for the meals she doesn’t like. Anyway, you get the drift. It’s an intention I have and will mostly have fun and get to be creative in having this happen.
I also encourage people to not get too carried away with having too many intentions. A few things to focus on a year would probably be good, no more than 4-5. Have fun with it. Pick something that would make you feel better about yourself. Pick something that would excite you. Another great tip I picked up from a program I did, was picture yourself on 12/31/2024 a little before midnight having accomplished your intention. Feel how you would feel, maybe proud, happy, peaceful? Then, go back 3 months to September 30, 2024, where would you need to be to accomplish your year-end declaration? Put that as a milestone. Then, go back another 3 months to June 30, 2024, what would you need to have done by that date to achieve this intention. Repeat for March 31, 2024. It was very powerful looking back from the place of having already achieved the declaration or intention.
Look into resources that would support your intention. Sign up for something or book something. Do it this week. Do one thing this week that will insure you doing what you say, and has others believing that you will do it. That’s an important tip, don’t procrastinate. So often, people start off strong than fizzle out within a month or so. Put some practices into place so that won’t happen to you. I’m taking on blocking out my schedule (and following it-the trickier bit) so I have set aside time on Sunday to meal plan and shop for anything I don’t already have on hand for the meals. I also signed up for a program, Aging Gracefully, that includes delicious vegetarian recipes and exercises. I’ve already tried several of the recipes.
Another intention I have is to finish writing my second book, so I have blocked out time early in the morning to write. This book is Flirting With Stupid with Friends and Family and I am still in need of and collecting stories for it. If anyone reading this blog would like to help me with this intention and has some ‘stupid’ stories with lessons learned they’d like to share, please contact me at flirtingwithstupid@gmail.com.
There’s another good tip, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Get a mentor, or a buddy to work with on your goals/intentions. I recommend having individual and family intentions. My daughter did some goal setting with her husband and 4-year-old son. One of my grandson’s goals is to have more family dancing! I love that. I want that too. How great to create traditions like this for your family. Whether you achieve them all or not, what a great space you are creating for family bonding and unity. Have some fun with this, get your intentions in place, write them out and share them with someone, or several someones. Be happy and blessed. My intention is for all of us to have an amazing 2024!